Wednesday, December 25, 2013

DEATH COMING CLOSER

I've once heard from a movie (Sherlock) said that "if you have something that make you very uncomfortable with, write it. If you have a blog, go write on yours. Not just about what does it make you feel that way but about everything so your stress slowly will ease."

So...here I'm. Writing my blog again to reduce what make me feel so missarable. Found it a book that I've read but forgot what the tittle is.

Neil Gaiman
"I don't know...death's a funny thing. I used to think it was a big sudden thing, like a huge owl that would swoop down out of the night and carry you off. I don't anymore. I think it's a slow thing. Like a thief who comes to your house day after day, taking a little here and a little there, and one day you walk around the house and there's nothing there to keep you nothing to make you want to stay...and then you lie down and shut up, forever."

I think it is. Slowly but sure, death will take you fully.

(Am I in some-kindda depress or something here?)

WHAT KYLE SAID TO JESSIE

I like this quote. Found it while watching the unsolved US movie series "Kyle XY". As for me, this quote just about recently make why every moments that had happened or will happen to me are very important. As for you readers, I'll let you decide whether it's worth to think about or just pass through like...mmm I don't know like what. Hahaha =)) sory guys. And here is the quote :

"Memories are a way of keeping the past alive. Some are so painfull we never wanna visit them again. But a memory can also be a gift. Something we can open again and again in order to fill ourself with happiness. And sometimes a moment become a memory the instant its happening, because it is so true, so pure, and so significant, you wanna capture it forever."

I had that moments. I collect those momories. Some are so delighful but other are so painfull. If only I have a Pensieve just like Dumbbledore, I will throw all the bad memories I have. But we are human with lots of capabilities to do anything so those unpleasent things will be forgotten.

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

ITSN'T GOOBYE, JUST HIATUS THEN.

Perjalanan hidup seseorang dinilai dari sudut pandang manapun pasti ada naik turunnya. Keuangan, hubungan dengan sang kekasih, hubungan pertemanan bahkan hubungan dengan Tuhan (dr sisi manusia tentuny). Dan kali ini, lagi-lagi saya mengalami hal paling yaaa cukup buruklah dalam hubungan pertemanan saya.

Kejadian akhir tahun 2011 kembali terulang. And again, it's all because of my curiosity. Hampir satu bulan saya bertahan untuk tidak mengusik teman saya ini dengan pertanyaan apapun, sampai akhirnya saya menghubunginya melalui aplikasi text. Reaksinya saya seperti biasa, berlagak bak seorang gadis manja karena saya anggap itu kasual dan saya mencoba santai. Namun reaksi dia menurut saya agak seperti akhir tahun 2011. Sangat membuat saya sedih karena pertanyaan-pertanyaan saya hanya dijawab sekedarnya (menurut penilaian saya).

Berdasarkan pengalaman akhirnya saya tidak mau digantungkan terus atas pertanyaan ataupun dugaan buruk saya (yang ternyata benar). Setelah saya tanya, meski akhirnya muter-muter dulu jawabnya, saya tahu kenapa dia berlaku seperti itu terhadap saya. He found out something very uncomfortable for him from his friend that I said something....aahhh saya gak sanggup menjelaskannya.

Long story short, saya tidak mengerti tentang apa yang teman kamu katakan tentang akun atau apapun itu. Tapi kalau indikasinya mengenai hal seperti akhir tahun 2011, ya saya mengakui perasaan itu pernah ada, dan masih ada. Tapi saya lebih rasional daripada dahulu karena saya tahu itu sia-sia. Saya tidak akan pernah berharap lebih dari kamu karena saya tahu itu adalah hal gila.

Ya. Saya jujur di sini, saya tidak akan pernah berharap apapun dari kamu karena saya tahu saya tidak akan pernah mendapatkan apapun dari kamu. Tuhan punya rencaNYA sendiri dan DIA akan memberikan yang terbaik seperti yang selalu kamu dan banyak orang katakan.

Don't worry. You're safe. I'm not that into you. But (again) if you still treat me like what you've done on last 2011, I'm really disappointed. You said I'm your friend. And I do say you're also my friend. And as you wish "  just like that", cause indeed from me here WE ARE JUST LIKE THAT FRIEND so please don't treat me differently.

There. I've said it. I'm so sorry if my act recently make you so inconvenience or what your friend said that I twit something that makes you embarrassed, please forgive me. I know we can't change the time so here I'm, making apologies to you.

Let's take another "Time out" and don't know up untill when but we're still friends like you've said. Forever.

Soo...move on then!

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

IS IT? OR IS IT NOT?

Kondisi 1.
W : "panggil nama dengan mengetik namanya sampai panjang ibarat berteriak dari jauh"
M : "ya"
(W berpikir "okeh, ni orang gak mau diganggu")
..................kemudian hening.

Kondisi 2.
W : "Hallow"
M : "Haihai"
memulai percakapan namun jawabannya hanya yaaa... sekedar menjawab saja tanpa ada reaksi balik untuk sekedar berbasa-basi nanya balik.
(W berpikir "kenapa sih gak mau nanya balik. saya kan juga butuh perhatian.)
..................kemudian hening.

Kondisi 3.
W : "Holla" (pasang emoticon lambai2 tangan)
M : " Halo"
lalu diam seribu bahasa.
(W berpikir "hadeeuuhhh....cape amat. dikirian ditinggal 1bulan bakalan dapet cerita dari M tapi dia diam seribu bahasa. Minimal nanya kabar kek, apa kek, masa gw mulu yang mulai. Halooo...saya teman kamu loh. saya juga butuh perhatian.)

diiiinnngggg.....................*hening

Goodbye then.